Change is the end result of all true learning, and learning happens best in connection with others.
--Leo Buscaglia, Author and Motivational Speaker
In between the moments of life, the chaos of school pick-ups, grocery runs, and finding a work-life balance, families across North Carolina have a deeper desire: a space to connect, a space to gather, a space to be seen, and a space to belong.
One respondent to the Family Insight Survey from Alexander County spoke out saying, their community needed “more community events to foster connections among neighbors.” Another from Guilford County adds, they need “community meetings with purpose.” What echoes through these sentiments is the human need for space and purpose. In a world that so often asks us to keep up, we hear from a participant in Washington County says:
“One change that would help my family thrive is having more community spaces for connection and support. Life gets busy, and sometimes it feels like everyone is just trying to keep up. If there were more affordable family activities, mental health resources, and safe spaces where people could come together, it would make a huge difference."
A family in Mecklenburg communicated that it would be ideal to have, “An actual sense of community. Not to see skin color and judge or treat a person differently.” People in Stanley County know they need “more options for community engagement” and someone from Henderson County points to a desire for “a community that supports them at every stage” of life.
These sentiments remind us of something deeply human: we need each other to feel like we matter, like we belong somewhere, and like we’re part of something greater than ourselves. To feel whole as individuals and to build flourishing communities, we start with the roots of connection and grow together through community.
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Community is not a luxury. Community is a lifeline for families across North Carolina; therefore, professionals who work with families should strive to encourage and foster environments with connections and community. When we center connection as the heart of change, we are allowing space for open communication, shared learning, and the establishing of collaboration that can lead to shared goals and accomplishments. This article explores how connection and community can catalyze change. When individuals feel seen, heard, and supported by those who are charged with supporting them, the ripple effects go far beyond a single meeting or issue. Connection can become the fuel for person-led transformations, which allows families to reclaim agency, resilience, and hope. In this article we will explore:
- The importance of connection, community, and belonging,
- How it can lead to purpose-driven engagement and positive change,
- How as professionals we can build communities where families thrive.
Why it matters: Individual Level
The writer Margaret J. Wheatley once said, “There is no power for change greater than a community discovering what it cares about.” Evidence has pointed to the considerable impacts and importance of community and connection. For starters, connection and belonging are closely intertwined. Geoffrey Cohen, a professor and the author of Belonging: The Science of Creating Connection and Bridging Divides, analyzes how:
“Belonging isn’t just a touchy feely construct. It’s actually something that touchy feel has hard consequences. It’s associated with physical illness, early death, cardiovascular disease, also vulnerability.”
Psychology Today explains that belonging is wired into our way of life, as we are social creatures who thrive in groups, “relying on shared resources and mutual protection.” Connection and belonging, on a biological level, release oxytocin, which is called the “bonding hormone.” As the article articulates just like Cohen, a lack of these experiences creates impacts much greater than an undesirable emotional experience. As visited in our Light Paper, Combating the Epidemic of Loneliness in The United States: Creating More Connected Communities, we highlight the past Surgeon General, Dr. Vivek Murthy’s, extensive report on the negative impacts of a lack of connection, including:
- Chronic loneliness is as bad for a person’s health as smoking 15 cigarettes a day.
- Children who experience loneliness and social isolation are more likely to develop mental health disorders, like depression and anxiety.
- An increased risk of developing dementia is associated with chronic loneliness.
- A multitude of longitudinal studies showed that poor social relationships are associated with heart disease and stroke, increasing the risk of premature death by 26 percent to 29 percent.
These statistics show that connection and community are more than just helpful, as they are essential to an individual's overall health.
Why it matters: Societal Impact
Not only does connection and community have an impact on our mental, physical, and emotional well-being on an individual level, it has profound impacts on our well-being as a society. A BMC Public Health journal article provided evidence that community engagement and trust are essential for increasing equitable access to resources and “supporting an effective and connected citizenry.” The Sustainability Directory explains that:
“Coping, though personal, is fundamentally enhanced by the collective strength and resources of a community. Community, in this sense, isn’t just about geographical proximity. It’s about shared identity, values, and goals... What binds a community together is the sense of belonging and mutual aid. This interconnectedness offers a vital buffer when facing life’s storms.”
Being a part of a community exposes individuals to diverse perspectives and gives them the ability to understand oneself in a bigger context. An article in the Medium broadens this idea by sharing that, “communities can be sources of resilience and empowerment” by giving individuals the foundation for self-confidence and personal growth. When we feel secure in our surroundings and can form individual identity and thoughts within the context of a wider community, we allow ourselves the ability to actively and constructively engage in society.
Connection and community are cornerstones for social participation, including civic engagement. Thomas Ehrlich, who is the author of Civic Responsibility and Higher Education, provides this definition of civic engagement:
“Civic engagement means working to make a difference in the civic life of our communities and developing the combination of knowledge, skills, values and motivation to make that difference. It means promoting the quality of life in a community, through both political and non-political processes.”
The Policy Circle outlines how when people are engaged in their communities and feel a sense of belonging, they can “exchange ideas, invest in finding solutions, and employ a civilized discourse to address the issues facing their communities.” Not only can this lead to creating community-led solutions to allow environments where families can thrive; it truly allows individuals to feel like they have a say in what goes on in their communities. The Urban Institute clarifies that for true, meaningful engagement to occur, people must not only engage with those who share perspectives with them, but also with people whose background and beliefs differ from their own, or what is referred to as ‘lines of difference’. While some may think connections have to occur between like-minded individuals, people can find solitude and relationships with those who cross the lines of difference. A study by More in Common found that most Americans not only value connection across differences, but are genuinely interested in it, especially when it involves working toward a shared goal. In fact, 66 percent of respondents said they believe they could learn something valuable by engaging with people who are different from them, and 70 percent felt a personal responsibility to do so. So, what is the problem? People feel like there is a lack of opportunity to engage with others, especially those across different cultures and values.
The research clearly shows when individuals feel like they are connected and have a place in their community, they are more likely to want to contribute to the greater good and create spaces where everyone has the space and place to have what they need to attain well-being. Connection and community benefit individual well-being and act as a linchpin for sustainable well-being of families and society; however, we need community leaders and professionals to step up to drive connections for salient societal progress.
Creating Spaces for Change as Professionals
Knowing the benefits of connection and community, those who are charged with working families have the vital role of facilitating and providing support in forging strategies to ensure people have access to opportunities for it to happen.
One way professionals who work with families can foster a sense of connectedness and shared purpose is through encouraging storytelling and listening. Boston University’s Center for Interdisciplinary Teaching & Learning explains how storytelling and listening are integral to building connections and eventual community change. The center speaks to how storytelling is a way for people to relate to one another and help people think about viewpoints beyond their own in a natural and human way. The World Economic Forum then speaks to how storytelling can be a force for social change, quoting the World Banks Head of Talent Management, Steve Denning who said: “When it comes to inspiring people to embrace a vision or change in behavior, storytelling isn’t just better than the other tools, it’s the only thing that works.”
Stories from a diverse set of families can create a wider image of family life and both the issues and strengths of communities, allowing professionals to grasp what services are most helpful and what gaps may exist. One way to encourage story sharing and listening is through the Institute for Family’s Shine on NC Initiative. This gives families in North Carolina a safe, accessible online platform where families across the state can share their lived experiences in their own words.
Additionally, RAFT: Resilience for Advocates through Foundational Training shares that, as advocates for families, as we navigate “the maze of social change,” it is essential to “keep in mind that you job is to lift up community voices instead of taking over or pushing your own ideas.” By helping establish spaces where community members feel their voice is heard and valued, and their boundaries are respected, environments of open communication and transparency can begin to develop. The Presser Foundation adds the idea that “community is not a monolith.” In other words, no two people share the exact same opinions; therefore, it is important we remember that everyone comes to a space with varying beliefs and experiences, which can be a great strength if we allow for active listening and lead with empathy. With story telling, community leaders and professionals can help facilitate individuals in finding their commonalities, highlighting their differences, but, most importantly, shining a light on humanity and empathy. Knowing someone's story can allow for an opportunity to bridge the anxiety of connection by providing conversation points, curiosity, and areas for action. Sometimes, people just need someone there to guide them in this direction.
Another way to elevate community and connection is to create opportunities where families can connect with each other and feel like they are making a difference through proactive conversation and problem solving. For family well-being initiatives, you may consider developing community advisory groups, design thinking workshops, or councils. The Digital School of Marketing presents that design thinking, a human-centered problem-solving approach, is a paradigm-shifting strategy for solving complex social problems and creating meaningful change. The article says:
“Grounded on human-centered principles of empathy, creativity, and collaboration, this approach addresses community concerns by placing the users at the centre to generate sustainable and impactful solutions.”
Not only does this strategy assist professionals with ensuring solutions are collaborative and addressing the immediate needs of communities they serve in a relevant, inclusive, and effective way, but it also ‘strengthens group ownership of solutions’ and, consequently, it connects families and individuals in a space that encourages knowledge sharing and aligned intention towards a collective mission. With intentionality, professionals can be catalysts for what More in Common refers to as connection cascades, which describes the phenomenon of positive experiences of connection increasing people’s interest in connecting again in the future. This is in the hopes of establishing self-sustaining cultures of connection. Often, people need a starting point. Professionals have the power to ignite that momentum, offering not only encouragement, but also the tools, guidance, and relational foundation needed to build lasting, supportive connections.
Conclusion
Overall, the equation seems simple, but has profound implications for the generational well-being of families:
Connection + Community + Support = Positive Change.
As discussed in the article, connection acts as the relational component that encourages a sense of identity and belonging, which are essential for feeling like one is a part of something bigger than themselves: a community. When someone feels like a part of a community, people can build collective strength towards creating waves of positive progress in their corner of the world. With the support of family champions, professionals, and leaders, communities can have the social capital and resources to form sustainable change. Sustainable change represents people’s ability to be both proactive and reactive to situations they face. Activating and nurturing connections, community, and support cultivates confidence, capacity, and resilience to shape their own futures. As professionals, intentional actions can elevate the narrative that families matter and have the power to make desired changes when they come together and feel championed.
If you have any questions or comments about the content in this Lightbulb Moment article, please get in touch with our Research Lead, Madeline Attianese, at mattianese@chsnc.org.
