Kristin Stout’s mother-in-law has always been deathly afraid of spiders. When Stout’s three children were young, her mother-in-law lived with their family, and that fear rubbed off.
“My children still won’t mess with spiders,” says Stout. “It’s hilarious — I have to take care of any spiders in the house!”
As the Safe Babies Court State Coordinator, Stout has seen the same dynamic play out in more serious ways. Parents and grandparents often influence how children feel about visiting doctors, attending therapy, or expressing their emotions. When children learn to fear or distrust those sources of help, they’re less likely to seek them out as adults.
Stout’s family story illustrates a fundamental truth: Families shape younger generations. This idea is closely tied to generational well-being, the process by which families meet their children’s physical and emotional needs and pass down tools for health, emotional awareness, and help-seeking from one generation to the next. This includes ensuring access to:
- Nutritious food
- Medical care (e.g., primary doctors, medications)
- Mental health support
- Emotional awareness and expression
- Safe, supportive relationships
- Help-seeking without stigma
Helping professionals work tirelessly to promote the physical and emotional well-being of the children and families they serve, with the ultimate goal of improving life for future generations. To meet the complex needs of these families, their work often requires collaboration with colleagues and providers across multiple sectors. This article explores the state of disconnection among human service professionals, highlighting key obstacles to collaboration and how these barriers affect their ability to support families effectively.
Progression of Well-Being
When should human service professionals start helping families promote well-being? From birth to age 3, children experience rapid growth and development, strongly influenced by their family. During this window, ZERO TO THREE reports that “a child’s brain produces more than 1 million neural connections each second.”
According to Stout, parents of children in Safe Babies Court Teams (SBCTs) experienced many adverse early childhood experiences growing up. (The Safe Babies Court Team™ approach is an initiative developed by ZERO TO THREE aimed at improving outcomes for infants and toddlers in the child welfare system.) In a 2018-2019 multistate study of active SBCTs, about 63% of parents reported four or more adverse childhood experiences(out of 10 total). This shows the lasting impact of early childhood experiences and trauma on development.
As children mature, families influence how they will live as adults. Dr. Sebrina Cooke-Davis, Executive Director of Prevention and Education Programs at Children’s Home Society of North Carolina (CHS), has seen this throughout her 30-year career in human services.
“While we confront challenges around equity and equality, it’s crucial to reflect on where we’ve been, where we are, and where we’re going,” says Dr. Cooke-Davis. “We all have a role in passing down not just health and wealth, but values, emotional resilience, and a sense of purpose. How we live, work, and engage with our communities today directly impacts the generations to come.”
Pandemic Disconnection, Remote Work
When the COVID-19 pandemic broke out, a period of disconnection set in among helping professionals.
“During a traumatic time of our lives, we wanted to lean on each other, but we couldn’t do so physically,” explains Dr. Cooke-Davis. “That created a natural sense of disconnection that has continued.”
In a 2020 survey of 253 social service organizations, 92% reported at least moderate impact from the pandemic, with more than half reporting severe effects. As demand for services surged, funding and staffing shortages made it increasingly difficult for these organizations to collaborate effectively and meet the needs of their communities.
Years beyond the pandemic, many helping professionals are choosing to work remotely, requiring organizations to reassess how they deliver services and allocate limited resources to the community.
Of course, there are pros and cons of remote work. It provides flexibility for people living in rural communities who lack transportation. If families have the technology to support virtual appointments, they can connect to human service providers via an electronic device.
However, it’s increasingly difficult to get families to engage in in-person treatment, even though conditions like substance use usually require spending time in a treatment facility. Coordinating handoffs to service providers — especially for programs such as intensive family preservation — has become more complex, particularly when in-home visits are in question. All of this makes it harder to serve families effectively.
Dr. Cooke-Davis recognizes that there are situations in which both professionals and families benefit from in-person contact.
“There’s real value in sharing space and energy with like-minded people,” says Dr. Cooke-Davis. “Some people crave the physical presence of others. Ultimately, we want to show up in the ways people need most.”
Dr. Cooke-Davis prefers a hybrid approach, saying she feels a more “organic” connection with colleagues when she’s in the office.
Working in Silos
“It’s human nature to want to get things done and often with the best intentions,” says Dr. Cooke-Davis. “But we shouldn't be determined to figure everything out on our own, especially when we can tap into someone else’s expertise. It takes constant effort to be intentional, to connect with colleagues across the state, and to be present for them.”
Dr. Cooke-Davis notes that limited community resources and geographic barriers can further intensify feelings of isolation. The key, she says, is to "lift your head" and look outside your immediate team.
“Making the right connection could lighten your load, even by 10%,” Dr. Cooke-Davis says. “Another agency or professional may already have a solution. It’s ongoing work to reach out, communicate, and break down silos — but it’s worth it.”
“If we all work together, we will be in a much better place,” explains Dr. Fahnie Stewart Shaw, inaugural Chief Operating Officer of Communities in Schools Charlotte-Mecklenburg. “It starts with bringing families to the table and asking them what they need, because you start realizing we can't do this in silos.”
Stout reflects on past approaches that removed children from homes to “fix” parents, without considering the trauma that was caused. “Parents had life issues they needed help with, but so did the children,” she says. “While some family situations are unsafe, children still remember and love their parents.”
The multistate SBCT study found that 30% of children whose parents had a significant history of adverse early childhood experiences were reunified with their parents. Stout attributes this success rate to the comprehensive medical and mental health assessments and service connections provided to parents in SBCTs, including evaluations for childhood trauma, prenatal alcohol exposure, substance use disorders, and domestic violence.
“The more we can surround them with support, the better they do,” Stout notes.
Lack of Resources, Staffing Shortages
Dr. Cooke-Davis speaks candidly about the ongoing challenges of limited resources and access.
“We don’t have enough resources to offer families,” she says. “Right now, we’re facing a car seat shortage. The company we rely on doesn’t have any. When a family needs one, where do I send them?”
These gaps force providers to prioritize each family’s basic needs. Scarcity also strains collaboration.
“It’s not supposed to be a competition — but in reality it is,” Dr. Cooke-Davis says. “If two agencies need help for their families, how do we advocate for both? There’s only so much to go around. That can lead to silos, as each agency has its own goals, funders, and outputs to meet. We’re all chasing the same grants.”
Finding balance is key. Helping professionals seek to be good partners while ensuring their organizations meet expectations. Sometimes that means getting creative.
“We may need to ask families, ‘Is there anyone who can loan you a car seat?’ because we’re just trying to find any solution that works,” reveals Dr. Cooke-Davis.
Staffing shortages can also create challenges when collaborating across sectors. With high turnover rates across many agencies and organizations, there are fewer partners and resources available to connect with families. This causes stress and uncertainty for helping professionals when they need to make referrals to partner organizations.
Lack of Buy-In or Participation
Stout notes that most instances of disconnection she has encountered stem from a lack of buy-in to cross-sector collaboration. Some potential partners, whether in social work, the Department of Social Services, the legal system, or other areas, may view collaborative programs as adding more work, more meetings, and more time commitments. There's also skepticism about the longevity of such programs, especially if they risk being shut down later.
Stout emphasizes the importance of gaining support from attorneys representing parents, ensuring they understand that the goal is to uphold families’ legal rights rather than jeopardize them.
“We need to communicate with attorneys in a way that reinforces we’re here to support families,” Stout explains. “That includes making sure attorneys are compensated for their time so they can prioritize collaboration. We also need to build trust with community partners, who may worry about becoming too entangled in court processes.”
“Everyone has different concerns,” she acknowledges. “We have to show that we’re aligned and that we care about the same issues.”
Once a collaborative initiative has been organized, success depends on all partners showing up and fulfilling their commitments, which doesn't always happen. While supporting a collective impact project, Dr. Cooke-Davis has experienced frustration with a partner agency that, despite signing on, has repeatedly failed to communicate, meet deliverables, or be accountable.
“One agency can slow down the entire body of work,” Dr. Cooke-Davis notes. “When you're not open to change or collaboration, you’re not just a poor partner — you’re holding everyone back.”
The ripple effect goes beyond internal logistics. Gaps in participation and missed responsibilities can delay timelines, strain resources, and ultimately impact the families the collective is meant to serve.
Overwhelmed by Daily Tasks, Compassion Fatigue
It’s no secret that human service providers have a lot on their plates — from working directly with children and families to attending court appointments, coordinating with resource partners, and managing ongoing reporting requirements.
“It’s important to make time for regular family visits and check-ins, but just keeping up with monthly meetings and day-to-day activities can create a sense of disconnection,” Stout explains. “When I’ve got a list of 12 to 15 tasks to finish before court, I don’t have time to stop and talk about collaboration with my colleagues.”
Helping professionals often become overwhelmed by the demands of their work. Activities that support collaboration, such as attending an optional meeting or joining a workshop, tend to fall by the wayside, even if they’re valuable.
Helping professionals who cope with secondary traumatic stress or compassion fatigue might find it much more difficult to connect with colleagues and providers from other sectors. Regularly handling serious, traumatizing situations for families and children can affect their ability to do their job.
Power of Prevention
Dr. Cooke-Davis has dedicated much of her career to championing the power of prevention. She believes that when helping professionals implement programs that proactively address issues, such as substance use or child development challenges, it not only supports families more effectively but also reduces the long-term costs associated with health care and social services.
Too often, philanthropic and service organizations are forced into reactive modes.
“Many professionals have gotten so used to applying bandages to problems — trying to fix the broken bone — when it would be far better to prevent the break in the first place,” Dr. Cooke-Davis relates. “To support families properly, we need to recommend solutions before problems even arise.”
While prevention strategies have improved over the past 30 years, Dr. Cooke-Davis acknowledges there’s still room for growth. By expanding education and raising awareness about the value of prevention, she and others in her field aim to secure stronger funding and broader support. Prevention programs focus on upstream efforts, proactively addressing the root causes of child welfare concerns and implementing strategies to strengthen families before issues emerge.
Family Engagement and Collaboration
Despite the obstacles faced by human service professionals, collaboration remains a powerful solution to support families and promote generational well-being. Stout has seen the lasting benefits of collaborating with parents and involving them in child welfare decisions.
“Once we start to depend on collaboration, that’s when things start to change,” reveals Stout. “We start to realize these are our community’s children – not just children within our agency or organization. When we collaborate and include them in decisions, they start to feel safer and more comfortable talking to others.”
Dr. Shaw echoes the need for helping professionals to ensure that “kids are at the center and families are at the apex” when collaborating to meet their needs.
“Recognizing families as equal partners is crucial,” says Dr. Shaw. “Engaging them with dignity and empowering them to be part of the solution makes all the difference. Through collective engagement, we must create conditions where people feel valued, heard, supported, and respected.”
Deeper Connections Between Sectors
Establishing generational well-being requires a commitment to building bridges across fragmented systems and fostering deeper connections between sectors. It’s clear what happens when systems operate in silos: Families fall through the cracks and don’t get the care they need to thrive. When helping professionals choose to break out of these silos, a foundation for future success starts to form.
The next articles in this series will explore how the social services sector, the public health sector, the education sector, and community-based organizations are embracing the concept of cross-sector collaboration. Now more than ever, these relationships are essential to weave a safety net for families. One intentional action can spark a ripple effect of change in North Carolina.