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THE CONTRACT

A Living above Suspicion Contract IS a written agreement mediated by a third party (e.g., a bishop, a therapist, or a trusted friend or family member) that outlines active steps that each party will take to begin the process of “living above suspicion:’ The contract is executed after there has been a full disclosure of the pornography use and of any related habits or activities (e.g., masturbation, phone sex, purchases, or live contacts).

The contract is intended to complement ecclesiastical supports, as well as intensive individual and couple therapy. As stated earlier, it does not substitute for other healing processes, but it can serve as a catalyst to get important work underway.

It is important for all parties to realize that developing the contract may require several meetings, depending on how stressed or emotional the couple is at the time they seek help. Although the couple is encouraged to brainstorm and reflect on the questions asked during contract development, we highly recommend that the couple work through the questions and steps with the help of a mediator, not on their own.